First of all, there is humanity on earth! 

He posted something other than a picture of his pretty face. He was still in the picture, but at least he's in a restaurant, posing in a candid way. For that, I'm so happy. And please, heaven help us no more of  pictures having a "blemish" caption. I couldn't even find a single mark on his face. Geez, if his face is a representation of blemish, then what would my face be representing? A huge pimple? Hahaha! Is he that vain to worry about a blemish that doesn't exist? I seriously cannot! Haha!

Well anyway, as for the real reason why I'm writing this...It is because finally, my Korean friend was able to give my gift to him, or should I say, to his manager. You see, before my travel to Korea, I had planned to give him a gift if I were to see him. But he wasn't in Korea when I came so I asked this very good friend to give it to him if she'd ever see him personally. And today, she gave it to his manager. 

Right now, I don't know if he has my gift. I suppose he has. If he doesn't, I also wouldn't be surprised. Honestly, I don't know what to feel. Should I be happy or sad? I'm actually more of anxious. Will he like the cap I gave him? It isn't too fancy. I hardly buy gifts for guys, just for my dad and brother. 

So I was really worried and all...until my friend convinced me to think otherwise. She said that whether he likes our gift or not, what's important is, we put our hearts into our gifts. Yup. That relieved me actually.

And she's right too. These celebrities are far too distant from us. There is no way to know who they really are. And we can't blame them if they don't like to open up or if they aren't in the mood to talk to a fan. I think she's right too when she mentioned that based on that last encounter, we should just like him as an actor and not as much as a person, or we'd be disappointed. 

I guess the problem is really us, not him. You see, we keep finding the qualities we think he possesses based on the interviews we've seen and the transcripts we've read of him. I've realized, that is both not fair to him and to us. We created a perfect being of him in our minds. The problem is, he is not perfect. Nobody is. And why do I have a wishlist of pictures I wish to see on his account? Am I his wife or something? Haha! 

I cannot believe how much more immature I've become ever since I became a fangirl. From now on, I will look at his pictures and like them if I truly like them. If I find a picture too narcissistic, then I won't hit the like button. Simple as that. I really don't care anymore if he shows a human side because maybe through his postings, he's actually trying to be himself.

I actually thought about it this morning...Maybe it's better that he posts those things than be so addicted to posting about everything. I am guilty of that myself, taking a picture of my food, posting it before eating. Think I'm addicted to social media and I may be nearing the hopeless case. So, I promise to live life normally from today on. 

I will still be a fangirl. Heck, my heart still leaps every time I see him. But I will try to go back to being a normal fangirl. Not the too obsessive, manipulative, judgemental fan that I always am. Actually, I'm more critical of those that I love more than those that I don't. I am myself's worst critic. 

So I hope he forgives me for putting so much pressure on him. I'll try to be a better fan next time. Just please, I pray he doesn't get to be superficial and narcissistic. Please????